Mar 17, 2010

The Gospel is like Warcraft II.

Every Sunday afternoon, I host a very small scripture study group at my apartment. Part of what we do there is ask each other questions that, due to time-related [or other] constraints, we would not bring up in Sunday School. At any rate, four days ago, it was briefly noted that at least in some ways, the Gospel is like the old video game Warcraft II. Allow me to expound on this subject.

1. Think of the idea of spiritual self-maintenance: how it is all too easy to neglect aspects of our lives that otherwise would have brought us significant spiritual benefit. We will inevitably be distracted by things (which admittedly are often virtuous), and we forget about maintaining little things - like daily scripture study. This is like Warcraft II because often you tell a peasant to go mine gold and it gets stuck in transit while you are out warmongering. A little later, you look at your main base again and notice that the confused peasant is just standing there idly, holding a sack of gold over his broad shoulders and not making you any money. If this goes on for too long without being noticed, your income is cut off, you can't compensate for your losses in battle, and your defenses are eventually overcome. In Warcraft, the "idle peasant" problem is more of an annoying algorithm issue than a fundamental game feature, but in the game of real life, it's not unfair to say that Satan uses your fallen nature's algorithmic flaws to his advantage.

2. However, Satan doesn't typically have to wait for you to be lazy or careless about your religious resource management. Sometimes he gets antsy and aggressive, and that's when he actively attacks your sources of spiritual strength. This is like in Warcraft II, when the enemy kills all your gold-mining peasants (pictured beside this paragraph) and then hangs around your gold mine daring you to try to train more. IT'S THE WORST. But of course, if you can do this trick to HIM before he can try it on you, it's golden. It's like in Alma 57:7-12 when the Nephites cut off the provisions for the enemy city Cumeni. If we cut off the devil's provisions, choke the "natural man," then his attempts at damning us will be ... well, damned!

3. Finally, the Gospel is like Warcraft II because good triumphs over evil. In Warcraft II, the Death Knights may have all sorts of cool spells (like "Unholy Armor" or "Raise Dead," always all sorts of fun), but there is nothing that matches the awesomeness of the 'good guy' Mage's "Polymorph" spell. The Polymorph turns an enemy unit INTO A FREAKING SHEEP.

So, whether it's turning water to wine or turning dragon to mutton, Jesus wins. Amen!

...Okay, maybe I went overboard on the Photoshopping for this article.